11/8, Some time for myself.

Dear Bloggie,


Ohh yeah! :D
Once again I'm here again!
TeeHee. :)
Just free from my exams.
How was my exam huh?
Hmm..
I can say, just okay okayy.
Some subjects were hard, and some subjects were easy.
I introduce my 'enemy' before right?
MATHEMATICS.
All that I can say is, IT WAS SO HARD.
Know my situation right?
I'm not very interested to Maths, I had no choice but trying to like it.
For my maths, due to the lack of time, some of the subjective questions I just leave it blank.
Ohh yea, and also, I don't know how to do.
>:(
Many of my marks already gone.
My heart, is breaking. </3
But please, at least a 'D'. :(
I will be very thankful if I didn't FAILED my Mathematics.
Okayy, the second subject, Science.
Yeaa, Science is one of my favourite subject, but for this time...
Ohh no.... :(
Just 20 questions for objective, and like 7 questions for subjective.
And the subjective stand 60 marks for the paper.
Yeaa, the paper is quite easy, but unfortunately, for sudden, I can't remember the things I had studied.
So, some I just simply give a good guess.
(But I know it's not.)
And also, for some, I know the answers, but I forgotten all the spellings.
The scientific names are just, too long and complicated.
If I failed my Science, OMG.
I still say I want to become a doctor some more.
>____<
Please, also, at least a 'D' for Science.
Last, for the History (Sejarah).
OMG.
I woke up at 5 a.m. today to study my Sejarah.
But, unlucky, I can't absorb the things that I studied.
Just like a reflection.
I studied, it reflects all the things in another direction.
:(
Some more still got the subjective questions, AGAIN.
I just simply write, just don't want to leave it blank.
During my Sejarah exam, it was also my Sejarah teacher's period, so she keep walking around of us and see our papers.
I don't want her to see my paper because I will feel embarrassed.
So I lay on my Sejarah paper.
But, when she passing by me, she just take my paper out.
I was like, OMG.
I just look at the table, cover my face, and started laughing.
I bet the teacher also can't stand with the answers that I wrote, so, she knocked my head.
>______<
Well, I really didn't meant it, I just...
*sighs*
Now, I will just pray to God, hope that my Sejarah won't fail.
(Although I think I will.)
Recently I lost confidence in myself.
I didn't focus much on my exam this time.
I don't know why.
Really feel so STRESSED.
The motivation that I used to have last time, ít disappeared.
:(
Telling the truth, I'm so lost.
Who can help me out? I want to walk out from this miserable maze.
I need a guidance.
I haven't be strong enough to do it alone.
Please, I don't wish to live in a life like this.
I know, other people just can give me advice, I am the one that must confront with all my feelings, and let myself out of it.
These days, during study time, headache will come.
It automaticly came, makes me feel so suffering.
That's the one of the reasons that I don't feel like study or doing anything.
I think I give myself too much of stress.
I'm stressing myself.
I want to acheive the aim that I aiming.
But, the results came out oppositely.
I push myself too hard.
:(
It's just make the thing more worst.
Motivation, is motivation that give me power to study.
Now, it's already gone.
For the last two exams, actually I did a good job, I'm satisfied with it.
First exam, I got 15th for my class position.
The mid year exam, I got 11th for it.
I'm improving, although it's still haven't reach the goal (within 10) that I wanted so badly, but still, I see the results.
But now, I know that, I will drop.
Because of some issues, makes me become like that.
Lucky this time's exam is not quite important.
Nevermind, take my time easily.
Now, be back yourself, don't skip class, listen to the teacher, pay full attention, copy all the notes that the teacher give and do all my home works.
Be a discipline student, July already past.
Okayy, I don't blame myself to be lost for that time, but now, I must walk out of it.
I must be free.
I must be set free from my mind and heart.
I'm free.
Don't think of the past, look foward to the future.
Still got a lot of fun things are waiting for me.
And also the friends that I haven't met. :)
Don't give up myself easily.
Keep going on, you won't know what's happening if you didn't go for it.
Now, exam's over, don't need to think about the results first, and give myself some time for relaxing.
My heart and my mind, I've burden both of you for so long, is the time for some rest.
Don't need to think about anything, just do some things that will let myself feel happy and enjoying.
Haha! :)
Ohh yea, because of this stress thingy, I think I gained weight also. :(
I lost my appetite, I didn't eat as much as I eat before, but still I think I gained some weight.
:(
I hate to be stress, stress has no advantage and just bring us the pain.
This is one of my 'hurtful' pain.
Please, my stress has to say 'Goodbye' with me.
I don't want to gain weight ANYMORE.
I'm fat enough.
T_____T
Stress, pimples too.
Keep on popping out.
ARGH. >:(
Pimples, I know you're stressed too, but can you find somewhere else to pop out instead of my face?
:(
For so long time I didn't get so many of the pimples!
*screaming*
A big one on my left side face.
So, the conclusion is, STRESS didn't bring us ANY BENEFITS.
Don't be sad, just like me.
Be happy always.
:)
Well, I did write a lot today, didn't I?
After I wrote all these out, I feel relief again.
That's why I need my bloggie so much.
Bloggie, ILY. ♥
You're always be there for me.
TeeHee!
Okayy, gotta go now.
I'm so tired after this long day.
Chaos.